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Thursday, July 8, 2010

Karolina Kurkova

Karolina Kurkova is a Vogue model and Victoria Secret Angel turned... um... Actress. She had a small role in a previous film My Sexiest Year which premiered at 2007 Hamptons International Film Festival and despite starring Harvey Kietel has not been seen since (No Amazon or Netflix listing to be found.)

Her real movie premiere is as Cover Girl in G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra. In keeping with that film's tradition of changing every beloved character, she is no longer a tank jockey, specializing in the Wolverine missile tank, and a respected mechanic; but is instead Dennis Quaid's aide-de-camp.

Something strange happened when I took screen shots of Kurkova. They almost all came out bad. They were in focus and all (This is not one of those scary ghost stories so calm down.) It is just in every shot her arms were in weird positions and her neck was crooked. It was if she was auditioning for Corkina a very special supermodel on Lifetime.

Most actors with any experience know how to walk and run on film but as anyone who has watched home movie knows it is a real skill. Remembering to do something with your arms is job one. In addition, many actresses have perfected allowing the camera to love them no matter what their expression. Kukkova looked like she just ate expired Mexican food in many shots.

Alas, she does have a great death scene and she is apparently a hard worker who does not steal other people’s husbands... (Unlike certain co-stars I could mention)

Therefore, I am willing to give her a pass in her first real film and look forward to her future work.

Karolina Kurkova African G.I. Joe The Rise of Cobra
"African death fever? No a very tame example of the Corkina Affliction"

Karolina Kurkova Association G.I. Joe The Rise of Cobra
"Karolina Kurkova Association G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra"

Karolina Kurkova Darestan G.I. Joe The Rise of Cobra
"Karolina Kurkova Darestan G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra"

Karolina Kurkova Eteobalea
"Karolina Kurkova Eteobalea in Red Panties and Bejeweled Bra"

Karolina Kurkova Studies G.I. Joe The Rise of Cobra
"Karolina Kurkova Studies Computers G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra"

G.I. Joe The Rise of Cobra Surface Karolina Kurkova Arnold Vosloo
"Great Death scene saves otherwise unremarkable performance."

Karolina Kurkova Trailing G.I. Joe The Rise of Cobra
"Karolina Kurkova Trailing G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra"

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